I am in Sydney now, staying at the home of a friend of a friend, who has been kind enough to put me up. So I am wandering around a big, beautiful, empty house, alone.
But I honestly don’t know what I am doing here. I feel more desolate now than I have at any time in the last year.
I have read back over the many hundreds of comments that readers have left, both on this blog and on facebook, since Chemo Chic began. It is bittersweet to read about how much fun we all had, laughing in the face of cancer. And it breaks my heart to be reminded of the hope that I held for the future. As I read, I re-live that joyous anticipation, for a moment. Then reality punches me in the stomach. I now know how misplaced my hope was.
Thank you, everyone, for all your comments. Please keep them coming. They mean a lot to me.