Thursday, 5 November 2009

Hair Hopes

Head fluff continues to increase and thicken every day. It’s exciting. Who knows how long it may take before actual hair will appear? I was talking to Mum about it this morning. “It takes a few months for babies’ hair to grow,” speculated Mum. “And it may take longer for an adult,” I mused, “after all, babies just grow everything like crazy.” “But then again,” replied Mum, “you were born with a full head of hair.”

I try to picture what my new appearance may be. I can’t imagine. Some kind of hopeful montage of Katherine Hepburn crossed with a L’Oréal shampoo commercial vaguely formulates in my head but then slips away. Looking in the mirror I see a bald old woman. I can hardly remember what I used to look like.

Of course I haven’t seen my natural hair colour since I was sixteen. In the intervening years I have been black, blue, purple, pink, deep brown, bright red and, mostly, auburn. I’m told that after chemo one’s hair might grow back curly. Or dead straight. Or Black. Or completely white.

Nick, Tessa and I go out to the Chelsea Arts Club to watch the fireworks display. It is all a bit of a shambles but fun. I think Tessa senses my insecurity about my looks. When Nick is off getting drinks, Tessa squeezes my bum and says “Don’t worry, you will be gorgeous again.”


Anonymous said...


It's the 10th and there's been nothing on your blog for 5 days you okay? Are you just getting loved up in the country with your man? Are you busy planning your new hairstyle now your mane is growing back? Send me a sign. Wanda xx (WB)

Anonymous said...

dear lily, i resisted the urge to write, along the same lines as wanda above, three days after we'd not heard from you. but now it's the 12th - surely the day you'll be starting radiotherapy? we hope all is well in the land of chemo chic, lots of love x

canalily said...

Thank you both for your concern. Nick and I have been away down at Flossie's place on the Kent Coast. No internet there. It was fantastic walking on the shingles by day and building fires in the evening. Tuesday was so still and fine that Calais looked only a stones throw away.

I am starting radiotherapy today so will let you know how it goes.
Love Lily x